Faux conservative blowhard and self-proclaimed “America’s most famous Catholic” Stephen Colbert had the keynote honors at the annual Alfred E. Smith Memorial Foundation Dinner in Manhattan last night, where Gov. Andrew Cuomo and a handful of other politicians and officials found themselves on the receiving end of the Comedy Central host’s roast-like barbs.
Colbert headlined the $1,500-a-plate fundraiser at the Waldorf Astoria, which raises money for the charity named in honor of Smith, the former New York governor and 1928 presidential candidate.
During his 12-minute remarks, Colbert dutifully ripped into those sitting on stage, which including Cardinal Timothy Dolan, CBS news anchor Scott Pelley and Cuomo
“Governor Cuomo is here. Governor, your excellency, an honor to be here on this stage with you,” Colbert said. “I didn’t know how you could possibly tear yourself away from the excitement that is Albany on a Thursday evening. I believe it’s all-you-can-eat iceberg lettuce night at the Sizzler.”
He also touched on Fred Dicker’s recent report in the New York Post, which found some state Republicans were trying to push Donald Trump into the 2014 governor’s race.
“I don’t know if you read The New York Post, it’s a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful—I’m going to say, newspaper,” Colbert said. “Donald Trump is coming after your job. Sir, listen, if you find orange bronzer stains on your office doorknob, just get out of there.”
Alas, Trump took to Twitter last night to all-but-quash a gubernatorial run.
Thanks for all of the great support but I just don't see myself wanting to run for Governor of New York – I have something else in mind!— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 18, 2013
(AP Photo/Jason DeCrow) (Audio of Colbert’s remarks via.)